Distance between things

It's been awhile. My life since the last post has been full steam ahead and then some!

Having time to reflect on my sojourn in Ohio, I realized I will miss all the wonderful people here. The kind of people I never expected found me. Or maybe we found each other. Perhaps it's because we've all been brought together in this college town and many, like me, are transient in nature. The faculty who have guided and mentored me are here to stay. It is their choice to be in this place, and live a quiet(er) life. And I very much respect that decision. They still have access to contemporary art; within four hours drive are at least 6 major museums, not to mention a plethora of galleries and art centers. Of course, being a university, visiting artists come and go each semester inserting bits of the contemporary artworld as they pass through.

I will also miss the time and space to make my work. It has truly been a gift. An opportunity recently fell into my lap and it's really got me thinking. All my adult life, I have wanted to open an art center with a residency program-- the gift of time and space for making, given to myself and others. Suddenly, this amazing opportunity is staring me in the face. I had imagined taking my time with growing and building my vision. Start-up money and a building, equipment and a great team would take time to develop. At this moment, I stare back comparing this new opportunity with my original vision; it looks like what I had imagined only many years into the endeavor. As I type, buildings are already built, money is available and the role of director is open, waiting for me.

Though no formal offer has been made-- we're trying each other on like a new sweater, checking to be sure the color and fit match-- I have high hopes for making this work. What their vision is, is not exactly clear. The start-up nature of these projects is often nebulous and vague, especially with no prior art experience on their part. An incredible amount of research has already gone into the project on their part, and of course on mine. Understanding the needs of the artists and the needs of the program will be a balancing act. Most likely, this will change and grow, evolving with each group-- visual artists, musicians and writers.

There are so many reasons I know I'm cut out for this job. And it's a big job! I stare back in the face of opportunity and smile. There will be moments of fear and uncertainty; in fact, there already have been. I will make mistakes, but learn and grow from them. But knowing how to succeed is something I'm good at. Taking risks is part of it. Balance is another. Trust in myself, trust in my comrades. Gratefulness and thanks to my teachers who have encouraged and mentored me; many thanks to their teachers too.

Even if I don't land this dream job, I won't be sad. It's given me time for great reflection on how far I've come. How lucky I am, that I'm doing what I love. ...and someday soon I might make a decent wage doing it! That being said, think those good hippie vibes and help me land this job! I'd love to be the one who welcome you as the next artist-in-residence at Brush Creek Ranch.

Celebration, 3oth birthdays, art

I just got done celebrating my friend's 30th birthday. Nothing too crazy; it was pretty low key. He's been there for most of the past year and a half of graduate school. We've compared highs and lows-- relationship and/or family pitfalls, emotional highs and artistic lows. Instead of getting crazy wasted like we might have at 20, there was a reverence for the history we've each created in our own life and with each other. But also how he and I have shared the past year and a half.

He came to graduate school knowing there was a life-changing miracle growing within his wife and partner. Their son, Holden (what a cutie!), is about 7months old. I came to graduate school knowing my partner and love of my life was staying 1500 miles away. Within the first few weeks of school I think we understood our similar feelings of intrepidity were different than typical graduate students' plight, and there was an instant bond. Over the course of the first year grew a trust and understanding of the deepest parts of ourselves-- where our art comes from, our own personal history and the deeply profound effect that those things can have on each of us IF we choose to acknowledge it. Acknowledging those things to one another has been of the utmost importance to me and my artistic development. Thanks, Brandon!

There were moments where he was unsure of the birth of his child; knowing how drastically it would forever affect his friendships and career and yet being willing to own up to the incredible opportunity to witness and be a part of the positive change in the world. There were also moments where I was unsure of the love that awaited me 1500 miles away. I was tentative to trust with the baggage I had been carrying around. Compounded with the death of my father, this separation from my life partner seemed too much to bear at times. These friendships helped me understand, like Dr Seuss said, "Where ever you go, there you are.".

Over the course of the past 16 months my friends and I have developed an amazing trust and understanding of one another. I write this in celebration of that trust and friendship that we can all celebrate in each relationship in our lives. If we choose to listen and take the time for one another, no matter how busy the circumstance, it will behoove each and every one of us. Listen to the what your friends have to say (or even the silence that hangs in between), and we will knit tighter the connection between each and every one of us. Something I think our society as a whole desperately needs.

Thanks to all my friends, my family and my comrades. You have made me the person I am today. I hope we all continue to cherish the beauty in our lives, questions the curious and revel in the laughter.